One Girl, Two Guys, One Ring

I’m so excited to share with you all that I’m engaged — actually, co-engaged — with my now-fiance Karen, and my metamour Geronimo. We are in a polyamourous relationship, specifically a V-triad, meaning that Geronimo and I are a-sexual and a-romantic with each other, but both deeply in love with Karen. She said yes, and yes!

As modern love rapidly changes in a world of globalization and technology, the number of people practicing forms of non-monogamy is increasing. At the heart of my relationship with Karen and Geronimo is a celebration of our commitment to each other while also empowering each other to pursue desires outside of our relationship.

I’m not preaching non-monogamy, but rather showing how I practice my authentic values for relationships. I chose to hack my love life in the way that was most optimal for me. Exploring your sexuality doesn’t mean the absence of responsibility or commitment. Society may espouse that you have to be exclusive to be committed, but I say we can have it both ways if we practice responsibly. My partners and I communicate openly, support each other’s boundaries and choices, and above all love each other in all our own ways. I’ve also been lucky enough to be part of a supportive community such as Hacienda, have an amazing open relationship coach Dr. Zhana, and a brilliant chosen-family lawyer Diana Adams.

My metamour and I who are now both engaged to the same woman, are not in competition with each other. Because at the end of the day our relationship goal is the same: to support the woman we love emotionally, physically, romantically, and more. All of us are a family together and are in it for life. There’s a high likelihood that she will have a child with one or each of us, but regardless, they will be our children together, as a family.

I also think it’s important to show that non-monogamy isn’t all playboys with lots of women. It can also look like a woman seeking out not just pleasure but support from loving partners.

I would love for you to check out our (adorable and sexy) engagement video above, or read the New York Times article that talks about non-monogamy (and features us!). Above all, though, I would love for you to open your mind and heart, and to support those who may be choosing this lifestyle, even if it isn’t the lifestyle for you. We are all loving in the ways that are authentic to us.

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