Aka, how I starred in my first porn film
I’m probably the most unlikely porn star. Average sized cock, Asian immigrant, a sex nerd / hacker / educator. But as of today’s film release, I’ve starred in a porno.
Okay, to be fair, I’m not talking, like, Brazzers. The film that was released today, “Tips n’ Tricks for Lickin’ Clits”, is an Erika Lust film directed by Reed Amber and Florence Barkway, of Come Curious. So, feminist porn studio who’s shared my educational videos before, and two women who are amazing sex educators in the own right. A very “me” type of porn film.
But the experience was really cool for me to see and be a part of! We’ve come a long way since naughty cave drawings, or even the porn of the 70’s. To star in a porn production that was both legitimate cinematography, had an educational narrative, humor, and so many women on camera and behind the scenes? It was powerful, to say the very least. And a whole lot of fun.
The whole process of filming with such a great team was awesome. Our crew, the Erika Lust team, and Reed & Florence & their team were professional, sex-positive, and really care about performers. It reminded me of exactly how I want to support my models on set — that not only should the shooting and sexual experiences be enthusiastic, but all the details are seen to with consideration.
I also loved the interview process that’s part of the final film! Come Curious purposely pulled multiple perspectives on the type of oral techniques people love. It shows the diverse views of sex ed, which I personally subscribe to in my practice. I emphasize adaptation and feedback so much in my teaching, and I love that this film also shows diverse preferences through the interviews.
“Tips n’ Tricks” also is a film that is authentic, raw, and with an inviting sense of humor. Sex ed like this is so needed. The behind-the-scenes shots are a lot of us laughing, and there’s definitely some amusing moments in the film. Because sometimes sex is funny and that’s what makes it fun! I loved tapping into that authentic way a sexual encounter flows.
It was really nice to see Reed & Florence directing too. They have a film background that pairs perfectly with their education, and makes them fantastic directors. Erika Lust once said something along the lines of, “when you see sexuality only through men’s eyes it’s one version, but when you can see it through women’s eyes it’s a different perspective that’s really valuable”. Working with women directors and educators really drilled this home for me, and was so well matched with my personal values of developing sex ed with women whenever possible.